-everything isn't enough...

 Why?

Why did it have to be us? did I  hold on to you in the wrong places? maybe I did. I cant say for sure because i don't know who to blame.

Whose mistake it is to have fed me the idea that love is meant to stay with us forever? And that love is meant to stay with us forever? & that love is something beautiful? you know when we first met, the universe was soo busy granting there peoples wishes. it didn't quite have the time to make me think you had a reason to be a part of my life. if anything at all, love was the least of a reason for you to stay. so I didn't understand when you showed up in the metro the next day & listened to me the entire time I walked you through the hollows of my being. in the days that followed, you spent every minute surprising me in ways I didn't know I could be.

Why? why did you choose me? we has nothing in common. I didn't watch anime. I was not even a fan of Mexican food until I ate with you. but we did stuff together. we were together in our differences. you understood & saw me meaning in my silence. we had those little moments when neither of us had anything to say so we just looked at each others eyes & smiled. slowly, you had become my home when this world felt like it was closing in on me. 

I am yet to figure out what tore us apart. now I have come to learn that your absence is merely an acceptance of your long-lost presence. its so exhausting to go over all these memories that seem to matter only to me. it hurts to look at all our photos & not finding you in them. we had everything. we were happy. it didn't have to be us. but I guess happy isn't enough. everything isn't enough. love isn't enough.